It seems like these days – everybody loves the drama, doesn’t it? But the truth?
Nothing grows in the weeds — that is what drama is. It’s the weeds that choke the life out of the flowers you’re growing.
That’s why I have a no tolerance policy for drama. On my team, in my family, with my friends. There is ZERO room for pettiness in my life. I have learned over the years that not calling out the behavior I see as a breeding ground for drama is only going to implode if left untouched.
I’m in the business of building people up and sometimes that means calling people out — in love. We all need that tough love every once in a while. And I am not one to sit back and let the workings of drama fester. I’m here to weed it out.
These are my best tips for creating a no-drama, no-negativity culture on your team — but hear me say this: These tips can be applied far beyond your business because we all know — there is drama everywhere we look.
As your team’s leader — you are the one who sets the temperature for your team. This is a big responsibility but it is CRUCIAL to the health of your team. Come up with “House Rules” for your team and lay them on the table right from the get go.
When you set the expectation that there will be a zero drama policy on your team, you’re setting everyone up for success. You’re letting your team know that this is a safe place for them to learn and grow and fail — which is what all developing leaders need.
On the other hand — when you allow people to feed into drama, you are creating an unsafe environment for your team. Which brings us to our next point:
As a leader, you have to be willing to have tough conversations.
Nobody likes conflict. Nobody likes to have uncomfortable conversations but, as a leader, you have to think of it this way — “If I don’t say anything and let this continue, how is it going to affect my team?”
Chances are this one conversation is going to save your team — but letting it go unaddressed will continue to grow weeds on your team.
Drama needs to be nipped in the bud. As quickly as possible, and as a leader, it’s your job to have those tough conversations. You may need to call it out in public as it’s happening or you may hear about it later and need to address it privately.
Either way, it’s your job to call it out from a place of love.
From a place of looking out for your team’s best interests.
Looking for a practical way to do it? Steal this script:
“This isn’t okay. You have a place here and we give grace and extend forgiveness and we can move on without looking back, but the behavior has to change.”
You’re acknowledging that your team is a safe place and their behavior is not aligned with this value. You want the best for them and your team — and the current behavior isn’t jiving with that desire.
Most of the time, you will both come out better on the other side after this. You have both learned how to navigate an uncomfortable situation. But sometimes, you have to bite the bullet and make some hard decisions.
No dollar amount is EVER worth drama or negativity on your team.
We all hope that the results of a conversation like the one above will be beneficial for everyone. That everyone will learn a lesson and the drama will disappear immediately.
But that’s not always going to be the reality.
Coaches on your team could be wildly successful which in turn makes your team more successful. But what if that coach is the one growing those weeds of negativity on your team? Is the health of your team worth the financial benefits of keeping this coach?
No dollar amount is ever worth jeopardizing the health of your team.
Knowing when to cut the weeds from your team is one of the most important qualities of a good leader. I would much rather cut someone from my team than allow the viral negativity to infect even just one other person. The greater good and success of my other coaches is more important to me than allowing this behavior to continue.
As a leader, you have to learn to distinguish between those who are really willing to learn and grow from this behavior and those who just let it fester. The good of your team is worth more than anything else.
You have to lead from the front lines.
As I said above, as the leader you are the thermostat for your team. You are the one who sets the mood and people will follow you. Whether you’re aware of it or not.
As a leader, I made a commitment to never complain about dips in the business, other coaches, or things that frustrate me. Because I know that these conversations do not create a healthy environment for my team and don’t serve anyone as they’re building their businesses.
YOU have to be bigger than the drama.
YOU are the one your team will look up to.
YOU are the one who needs to be leading by example. My team sees me have those hard conversations.
My team sees me pull out the weeds of negativity as soon as they sprout.
My team sees me build others up and encourage them.
And because they see it modeled for them — they model it for others.
The health of your team depends on the health of their leader. So be willing to grow and learn from every experience. Constantly pour into yourself so that you can be the best leader you can be.
Drama and negativity do not need to grow on your team. Work towards building healthy relationships and patterns that foster love, care, and teamwork. It all starts with you.
Start calling it out.
Start recognizing the good.
And start pulling out those weeds.